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In this pun on empty promises, we see emptying promises - i.e. one person promises another to do much emptying (empty the trash, empty the laundry, empty that sour milk from the fridge that has been there way too long.)
Empty promises are out, emptying promises are in!

Tags: love

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In this comparison cartoon, we see Moby Nice, a white whale apologizing to Ahab and inviting him to his Presidents' Day party, versus Moby Dick, who is just being mean to Captain Ahab.
No, I didn’t read the book. Why do you ask?

Tags: literature, this or that

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In this pun on Leonardo Da Vinci's "The Last Supper," we see "The Lost Supper," Jesus and his apostles sitting at the table with no food. It seems they ordered dinner online and the delivery info must have gotten lost, and everyone is hungry.
The spectrum of the emotions I experience when I’m hungry (sad, very sad, and angrily realizing I could’ve just ordered pizza hours ago and avoided this whole mess)

Tags: art, food, religion

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In this pun on spread eagle, we see the spread eagle, a bald eagle holding a tray with an assortment of spreads.
Now we just need the Chips Hawk.

Tags: animals, bird

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In this comparison cartoon, we see a fiddler crab (those crabs with one big claw) next to a violinist crab - a classy bow-tie-wearing crab holding a violin saying, "Well, when I was at Julliard..."
Crustaceans, explained

Tags: animals, music, this or that

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In this pun on duck-billed platypus, we see a duck billing a platypus. The duck says, "Unfortunately, I do not accept your insurance. That'll be $853."
Coincidentally, ducks are the only medical providers that do accept my insurance.

Tags: animals, bird

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Ernie is in a wrestling match with a woman who holds him in a head-lock. Both are clad in wrestling attire. Ernie seems surprised. The caption reads- This was not what Ernie expected when his friend told him he'd "found a match" for him.
You're my better half (Nelson).

Tags: love

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In this pun on acid trip, we see a convertible filled with three containers of acidic liquids - all wearing sunglasses, hands in the air, yelling, "Vegas, here we come!" (The liquids are orange juice, a can of soda, and vinegar.)
Who am I kidding? We all know they're actually going on a trip to give me heartburn.

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In this pun on wild flowers, we see a wild flower - i.e. a flower in a leather jacket with sunglasses riding a sweet motorcycle.
Forget asters, I'm all about bad-assters.

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In this pun on friendly fire, we see a campfire that is very friendly (holding some freshly baked cookies and offering them to you!)
It is 50 degrees over here, and I would love to befriend an anthropomorphic campfire.

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