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An old-timey woman leaves a voicemail on a pay phone, saying "Ishmael, it's your mother. I don't know why you keep letting my calls go to voicemail, but please, Call me Ishmael!" Herman Melville, writer of Moby Dick, has a eureka moment.
This is probably historically accurate.

Tags: literature

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Some cars swim around in a swimming pool.
Getting ready for #HotCarSummer

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A car, dressed like a clown.
Follow your dreams, even if society is pressuring you to grow up to be an ambulance or a limo.

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A church and the state of Texas sit on the couch across from their daughter and tell her, It's just a trial. Mommy and daddy still love you very much.
Who are we kidding? We know they'll get back together.

Tags: political, religion

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In this pun on Herman Melville's Moby Dick and a mobius strip, we see a mobius strip made up of the white whale connected to Captain Ahab's ship, The Pequod.
A non-orientable, seemingly infinite novel

Tags: literature, math

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A smiling radish wears a graduation cap and holds a diploma!
Fresh and ready to face anything the world (or salad) tosses at them!

Tags: food

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In this pun on the fairy tale "The Frog Prince," we see a frog, printing from his computer.
The classic fairy tale where, when you kiss a frog, he helps you install new toner and teaches you how to connect to your printer via Bluetooth.

Tags: animals, computer

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In this pun on Flat Earthers, we see a convention of people (probably dopes) watching a presentation on why the earth is fat.
It's scientifically true!!1! #science

Tags: political, science

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In this pun on Saturn's Rings, we see an anthropomorphic Saturn, with its hands in the air, with every finger decked out in a sweet ring.
Treasures of outer space

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The most seize-the-day fish (the majestic carp) says, "The world is my oyster!" Forget carpe diem, it's all about carp diem.
Seize the (catch of the) day!

Tags: fish

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